[MTM] You’re not behind... you’re becoming

April 22, 2025 | Issue Archive​

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You’re Not Behind—You’re Becoming

I’ll be honest with you.

Some days, I look around and think…

I should’ve been more. I should be further.

Which is wild, because I get emails all the time—from aspiring speakers, emerging thought leaders—asking how to build a business doing what I do.

And yet, even after 20+ years of this work, approaching 50, I still sometimes wonder:

Shouldn’t I have built something bigger by now? Earned more? Accumulated more?

I know I’m not alone in those thoughts.
You probably have them, too.
And if you're a leader, I’m certain you’ve heard them from your people.

The voice that says,
​“I’m falling behind.”​
​“I’m not where I should be.”​
​“Everyone else seems further.”

But over the years, I’ve picked up a few mantras that have helped me quiet that voice. Ones I return to in the space between doubt and peace:

This is part of it.​
​It all belongs.​
​You’re not behind—you’re becoming.

We think of growth as linear. But growth often looks more like a spiral.

Moments that seem like detours are actually deepening.

Moments that feel like pauses are actually preparation.

As a leader, maybe your greatest gift isn’t pushing your people to get somewhere faster…

It’s reminding them they’re not late. They’re right on time.

That the pressure to arrive now can kill the joy of becoming fully.

And the same is true for you.

Here’s why this matters:

Becoming is adaptability.

It’s the willingness to let go of where you thought you’d be… to step into who you’re meant to become.

It’s what allows leaders—and teams—to grow through change, not just go through it.

When you release the pressure to “arrive,” you make space to evolve.


THIS ENDS NOW

Identify one habit, belief, or behavior that’s no longer serving you—and let it go.

Let go of the belief that your timeline is wrong.

Stop measuring yourself—or your team—against milestones that were never yours to begin with.


THIS MOMENT MATTERS

One simple, actionable step to take to create a ripple effect of change in your life

Reclaim your pace.

Lead yourself (and your team) from presence, not pressure.

Ask:

“What’s trying to become in me?”​
​“What’s trying to become in them?”

Give it space. Trust the unfolding.


Your or your team’s next chapter might begin with one bold ending.

Here’s to making The Brave Choice.

Up we go—

P.S. Adaptability isn’t just about managing change—it’s about becoming someone new in the face of it. Want to know how adaptable you really are right now? Take the Radical Adaptability Quotient Quiz and discover your score across the 5 C’s of Calm, Clarity, Courage, Confidence, and Connection.

​Take the Quiz →​


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What if the breakthrough you’re looking for begins with an ending?

I’m Shawn Ellis—keynote speaker, creator of Radical Adaptability™, and a student of one question: Why do smart people who know what needs to change still get stuck? For more than 25 years, I’ve had a front-row seat to some of the world’s leading thinking on leadership, performance, and change. I’ve also learned firsthand that knowing what to do and actually doing it are two very different things. Here, I explore that gap—and the endings that help us close it. You’ll get practical ideas on change, leadership, courage, adaptability, and the human patterns that keep us holding on when it’s time to move forward. Because the new beginning you want may be on the other side of an ending you haven’t chosen yet.