Sometimes, what appears to be a meaningless or even wasted experience can lead to profound insights.
Let me tell you about one of those I had...
Several years ago, I went to what seemed to be the "worst therapy session ever." Surprisingly, though, it became a cornerstone moment in my journey. (One you'll hear more about in my upcoming book, Mastering the Moments. 😉)
After my divorce, I sought out a therapist for the first time. I was hoping to find some clarity and support. What I found was a nervous intern—so nervous that my chest was tighter when I left than when I went in!
As I sat in his stark, cold office, I doubted anything valuable could come from our session. He went through the motions like a telemarketer reading a script, his voice quivering with every question.
After telling him about my situation, he responded dryly, "That sounds tough."
I'm pretty sure he was just reading "Response #7" from the paper on his clipboard. I wanted to say, "Let's try that once more, with feeling!"
Then he surprisingly took a turn into fantasy land...
"Imagine you went to sleep tonight and overnight, there was a miracle," he said. "When you wake up, everything in your life is exactly as you would want it to be. What would you see to know that there had been a miracle?"
I indulged his question and rattled off everything I could think of:
"I'd be in a healthy, loving relationship. I would be doing work I love. I would be debt free with a surplus of money in the bank. My son would be thriving."
"And how would that feel?" he asked.
Again, I thought about it and answered.
"I would feel happy. Excited. Confident. Grateful."
I don't remember what he said to that. I just remember walking out to my car—chest tight—and heading home.
On the drive home, I was replaying how ridiculous and worthless this session had been. Well, I did it, I thought. At least I can say that.
But somewhere along I-440 on my drive home, I started replaying that sequence of events around the "miracle question."
It hit me: Did I just tell him that if my life was perfect, then I would be happy?!
I had already been a student of mindfulness for years at that point. I knew better.
Of course. Who wouldn't be?!
That wasted therapy session wasn't wasted after all.
I realized, I could keep sulking about everything that was wrong with my life, or... I could see that my answer to his "silly" questions actually pointed me to what I really wanted to experience: happiness, excitement, gratitude, confidence, and peace.
And, my reflection reminded me that rather than waiting for a "perfect life," I could claim my power and choose to create those desirable feelings now, regardless of circumstances.
Ah, yes.
Have you ever had one of those "wasted" moments that turned into something so much more?
Every moment has that possibility... if you're open to it.
If you are only inspired to bring more of that awareness to your days, that's a victory.
But if you'd like to go further, let's apply what I learned on the drive home...
Imagine, just for a moment, you are a masterful gardener of your soul. Each small act of mindfulness or positive intention is like planting a seed in fertile soil. Over time, these seeds grow, they flourish into a lush garden of joy, peace, and confidence, regardless of the external storms.
Now, close your eyes and vividly picture your ideal life. Feel the textures under your fingertips, hear the laughter and music of this life, smell the freshness of this new morning. Immerse yourself in these sensations, let them envelop you. How empowering it feels when you realize that you can cultivate this inner landscape at any time, regardless of the outer chaos.
Feel the peace, feel the joy, feel the empowerment—over and over, day by day. With each breath, let these feelings wash over you, deeper and more profound. Feel them, embrace them, become them.
Imagine waking up tomorrow, stepping into a day where everything aligns perfectly with your deepest desires. How will you carry yourself? What will you choose to do first? See yourself moving through this perfect day, every action and decision infused with confidence and joy. Feel every positive emotion as if it has already happened, as if this day is your reality.
Those two simple questions from a shaky intern wasn't just about imagining a perfect life (err, a fantasy life). It was about actively stepping into that visualization, embodying the peace, excitement, gratitude, confidence, and joy that I desired.
This is the task for you and for me, every day.
And when we get off track—as we will—we can always choose to begin again... right now.
Be that person who attracts success by the qualities they embody. Watch as the world around you begins to align with the profound inner changes you've made. Remember, Mastering the Moments isn't about thriving someday. It's about learning to thrive in this very moment... just exactly as it is.
May your day be as beautiful as the garden you're growing inside.
Up we go—
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